*And by "Saturn," I mean "the Multiverse."
I hate the Multiverse. I hate it with the burning passion of the infinite suns that light its pitch-black skies. I want DC to play home to one Earth. Just one. Not two, not five, certainly not X, and not Infinity.
I know when it first started, too. It started with Who's Who Volume IV. I didn't own the comic until recently, but someone I knew in 3rd grade, knowing I was a comic fan, brought it to class a couple of times, and I absorbed its wealth of information. This was my first exposure to the Calculator and Calendar Man! My first glimpse at Captain Marvel! My first look at Changeling! And, sadly, my first induction into the world of the DC Multiverse.
"Why are there two Catwoman entries?" wondered my nine-year-old brain. "When did Catwoman and Batman get married? They had a kid? Catwoman's dead?"
I didn't understand the concept of Earth-2, and to be fair, I really didn't have much context for it. That would have been 1992-93, and I didn't start actively reading DC until December of '92 (though I have the sneaking suspicion that Who's Who crossed my path in the Spring of '93). But I have since encountered plenty of material on the various Earths, and I feel very secure in my utter hatred for their existence.
I don't like the idea that there could be more than one of Superman in a fight. More than one of Batman seems like overkill, especially given the existence of Nightwing, Oracle, and Robin. The Batman family of Multiple Earths could potentially include Batman-1, Batman-2, Robin III/V-1 (since Tim is the 3rd and 5th Robin), Robin-2, Nightwing, Huntress-1, Huntress-2, Catwoman-1, Catwoman-2, Batgirl II-1, Oracle, Bat-Girl-2, and Bat-Woman-2. Superman's family? Superman-1, Superman-2, Supergirl III-1, Power Girl, Superboy-1, Superboy-Prime, Krypto-1, Krypto-2, Steel I, and Steel II. Four of them are each nigh-omnipotent.
I don't like splitting up the universe and the dynasties. The best thing about the original Crisis is that it gave us a generational DCU. Superman wasn't the first, last, and best Superhero, he just kicked off the modern age. There was a whole generation of heroes before him, and there's a new generation coming after. That's one of the things that makes the DCU so unique: it's all about family and pantheons and legacies. That wouldn't be the case if each generation operated on a different Earth.
When Hypertime came along, I had a similar reaction, until Superboy's "Hypertension" storyline and the Flash's "Dark Flash" arc proved to me that it could work. Hypertension established that crossing barriers in Hypertime was really freaking dangerous, and took a hell of a lot of power. It wasn't something that every super-speed schmoe or human vibrator could do on his or her own.
Sidenote: The Human Vibrator will soon show up as arch-nemesis to the Birds of Prey.
"Dark Flash" established the more important point that crossing Hypertime barriers was dangerous to the universe. It caused other Hypertime anomalies to leak through and build up until something got corrected, or until whole universes ate each other.
Hypertime also makes more sense in a quantum fashion, where every choice spawns multiple new tributary universes, and there isn't necessarily a single "right" one.
But Hypertime won me over through underuse and hyperregulation, so it wouldn't become the trick-of-the-week parallel universe MacGuffin.
You want to know the biggest reason, though? I hate explaining it to people. I'm a bit of a DC history buff, and people know that, so I get questions. Especially about Superman. And more often than not, the answer to those questions starts with "yeah, originally, before they restarted his history in '86." Which inevitably leads to a convoluted answer to their original question, as it was in pre-Crisis and as it is now.
So, when a friend of mine starts discussing a story she read some time ago where Batman and Catwoman got married, and asks for further info on that, I have togo into the whole history of Earth-2, what makes it different from Earth-1, and all that.
Explaining DC history post-Crisis is hard, but it's not nearly as hard as trying to explain pre-Crisis stuff, or things that bridge the gap. I don't like doing it. It's prohibitively confusing to newcomers and non-fanboys.
Meanwhile, the heroic dynasties add to the mythoses. They give characters legacies and history. They give the universe cohesion and a rich tapestry of history. They make sidekicks make sense.
I want DC to stay the universe of families and dynasties, not the universe of redundant characters, superfluous worlds, and one-sided battles.