Justice Fatigue: An Exhaustive (and Exhausting) Discussion of Zack Snyder's "Justice League"

So, Zack Snyder's "Justice League." 

Prelude to a Bad Decision

I decided, apropos of nothing, to put on Joss Whedon's Zack Snyder's "Justice League" while doing some work today. I discussed the movie when it came out eleventy billion years ago, and thought it was fine. It's not good, but grading on the curve of every DCEU movie up to that point, it was a solid B-. Sitting in 2021, I remember bits and pieces of it—Steppenwolf looking like he stepped out of an XBox 360 cutscene, the decent cell phone video of Superman that was marred by the terrible attempt to CGI out Cavill's moustache, all the characters sounding like their rough counterparts in "The Avengers"—but not a lot of details.

Obviously the intervening years have altered my perspective on the film, both through the revelations about the behind-the-scenes racism and abuse and through the fanatical and also frequently abusive behavior of the fans clamoring for this version of the film, which absolutely definitely existed and was finished years ago and also needed an additional $70 million dollars and reshoots to complete. 

That perspective has not been altered for the better. 

Against my better judgment, I'm going to watch the Snyder Cut sometime, probably this weekend, so I figured it'd be good to see how it deviates from the theatrical release, like I did for the Lester and Donner cuts of "Superman II" so very long ago. I don't expect to enjoy either one; my feelings on the superhero movies of Zack Snyder are well-documented, and even under the best circumstances, four hours is too @#%*$! long for a superhero movie. But four hours of nihilistic spite dressed up in cinematic deepities and CGI with a sepia-toned overlay is unlikely to be the best of circumstances. 

Will it be better than two hours of the extremely generic re-skinned "Avengers: Age of Ultron" that got released to theaters? There's only one way to find out!

Walking with Superman: Day 114

A few years ago, a portion of San Diego fell into the ocean, taking with it thousands of residents, who would have died if an induced genetic mutation hadn't made them into water-breathers. For a time, Aquaman protected the region, dubbed "Sub Diego" by its residents, until he was able to raise most of it above the waves and restore the populace. But hundreds were left behind even then, joined by many refugees from various disasters that affected Atlantis. When Aquaman disappeared for so long, they were left without any defense against the ocean wilderness. Now, Superman's journey brings him to the frontier town of Sub Diego, where the residents have found a new savior in the form of the sorcerer Ronal! His shape-altering enchantments have made him a hero to the undersea denizens, but Superman fears that Ronal's motivations are less altruistic than they seem.

Donovan & Delurking

When I concocted the fake solicitations last night, I tried to make it believable, to make the joke kind of subtle, and to make it ultimately clear that it was a joke, but I may have failed at that last part (sorry Loren!). I chose Joe Kelly because he's a moderately popular writer without a whole lot on his plate at the moment, and thus would be far more believable than "Joss Whedon" or "Geoff Johns" or something, which would have tipped the joke too early. Mahnke and Nguyen did the Atlantis-centered "Obsidian Age" storyline, so that's believable enough.

But I thought I'd put in just enough to make it clear..."Following the success of Kurt Busiek's AQUAMAN: SWORD OF ATLANTIS," not to mention how ludicrous it would be for DC to do a 12-issue maxiseries for a character who has trouble carrying a monthly title, when said series wasn't penned by a superstar. Maybe Neil Gaiman or Mike Carey could carry an Aquaman maxiseries, but Joe Kelly? I love Joe Kelly, but I don't think DC has quite that much faith in him.

As far as the "why" of the joke, I heard Donovan's "Atlantis" on my random playlist, and thought 'with all the different mythology and magic craziness that has been assigned to Atlantis over the years, from Peter David's various mythological tropes to the Arthurian legends of the Veitch run, how had the comics avoided pulling mythology from vaguely psychadelic '60s music? I mean, I didn't think it would be good; Donovan only ever names five of the Twelve anyway: "the Poet, the Physician, the Farmer, the Scientist, the Magician, and the other so-called gods of our legends." It's the NewAgey version of the early Gilligan's Island theme song "...and the rest."

I thought it would come out ridiculous, but the more I wrote it, the more tenable it seemed. There's something to be said for the idea of a story about a young Aquaman, rushing around to save his kingdom. The more I thought about it, the more I realized it could work as kind of a "Thor: Blood Oath" type book. And I really enjoyed that particular miniseries. I still think it'd be cheesy to incorporate Donovan's thin mythology into DCU history, but the idea of Arthur chasing after the antediluvian deities who abandoned the doomed continent? The idea of exploring the early history of Aquaman? It actually sounds like a book I'd buy. And that scares me, just a little.

But I guess it goes to show that there are few intrinsically bad ideas. You know, unless they involve self-mutilating New Warriors.

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Apparently it's National De-Lurking Week. So, if you're one of the hundred and thirty average visitors (or the sixty-three above average ones) I get a day who doesn't say much, it'd be awesome if you'd comment on a post someplace. I get a kick out of reading new comments, so any and all are appreciated. Thanks!